Hostess - Nettle
I am having so much fun here, hey and I am famous as well! I am on the internet. Naaa, not only here, on this very private website, nooo, I am on , where I'm originally coming from, ya know . Boo, our soul, heart and wonderful admin of this website is covering the whereabouts of my Bro Eb and my Cousin Zelig as well, whee, how sweet is that, hu?
Boo is looking after us, thats for sure, no matter how far
we are away from her. But she wouldn't have to worry about us, cause we are grown gnomes and we can manage....err....almost anything!
The nettle woman and me got very close over the long weeks that I've been a guest in her house.
I think, she had a crush on me, tehee, no wonder, eh? I am handsome, my beard is the best and I am a very good kisser, yea Maaaam!
Brace yerselves, folks for the story is getting rough now.......oih!
Well, it wasn't a bed of roses, noooo, it was even better......
Yeah, look at that and weep, all ye male gnomes out there. I didn't have to sleep in a drafty shed or even outside between the damp flowers and smelly herbs? Out there in the wild, with rabbits nibbling at your beard? Nooo, Sir! She let me sleep in her undies drawer...smelling of roses and magnolia soap....oih. I had some sweet dream.
Susanne, the nettle woman and me were getting along very well, you might think, and I even made friends with this hideous cat of hers. I met two nice fellows of her couch, and we spent many nights chatting and cavorting, and plundering the fridge. One was a cute little bunny, one of the fluffy types, ya know. Cuddly and so sweet! We were pals the minute we laid eyes on each other. The other one was a pig-sort-of-teddy-thing, a nice guy, silent but witty and totally devoted to the bunny.
I should have known I was treating on dangerous ground here, and all would have gone on well for ages and ages when one day.......
I got framed!!!!
I am sure it was that darn pig-thing!
Jealous to the bones he must have told everything to the man and I am sure he didn't leave any of those exquisite detail out.
He talked about me to that man, about the bunny, the woman, about the plundering, cavorting and so on....
I knew I should have stuck to being a garden gnome and should never have meddled with the folks indoors. It was too late for remorse. Too late to be wise, doh!
One day, when the nice woman Susanne was out shopping and I, together with pretty bunny, was out terrorizing the birds at the feeder, the man came home early and chased me around the garden. Me, with my short legs was fast, but the trained man was faster. He caught me and there was nobody to hear me screaming and fighting.
I fought for my live....like crazy...but nothing and nobody could help.
I ended up in ......
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